A trad wife influencer is now under intense scrutiny online after a recent article exposed the glaring red flags in her marriage.
For those who don’t know, a “trad wife” is a label applied to women who have adopted traditional gender roles as a wife, mother and homemaker. Think along the lines of spending all day in the kitchen, cleaning the home, and child-rearing. And one of those who’ve seemed to embrace the trad wife lifestyle is Hannah Neeleman, better known by her social media handle Ballerina Farm.
For years, the devout Mormon has been making content on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube, all about her daily life on a farm in Utah with her husband, Daniel Neeleman, and their eight kids. Like many trad wife accounts, she shows off how she cooks with ingredients sourced from their garden, manages the home, cares for the farm animals, raises her children, and more. Some examples of her videos? Check it out (below):
@ballerinafarm Henry made us rhubarb spoon cake this weekend, it was a dream ✨ He has been thumbing through The Lost Kitchen cookbook and found this gem!
♬ original sound – Ballerina Farm
@ballerinafarm I’ve always liked to swoon Daniel with good cooking. And since this week is our 12 year anniversary I’ve been hip-deep in pans and dishes. ????His favorite meal is chicken parmigiana, not a small ask. This year I upped the ante by rolling out homemade pasta, which made all the difference. Happy anniversary, @hogfathering ????
♬ Che La Luna – Louis Prima
@ballerinafarm Fresh morning milk and @Daniel in his boots and shorts ????. (“These are a few of my favorite things…”????).
♬ original sound – Ballerina Farm
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Her life looked picture-perfect, based on her posts. But a new article from The Times this week paints a completely different picture. And people soon learned that Hannah’s marriage is not as happy as her social media makes it seem! Starting from the beginning, she had aspired to move to New York City from Springville, Utah, and be a ballerina for most of her life. And she was “a good ballerina,” too! So good, in fact, she went to summer school at Juilliard at 14 years old and then returned for her undergraduate degree. However, her dance dreams quickly went out the window when she met Daniel, the son of billionaire JetBlue airlines founder David Neeleman…
At the time, he was 23 and she was 21 when they were introduced by a mutual friend at a college basketball game. Daniel immediately wanted to go out with Hannah. However, she refused his advances for six months. When Daniel learned one day that she would be getting a JetBlue flight from Salt Lake City to New York to go back to school, he pulled some strings to get a seat right next to her – and they had their first date! Some may say that was romantic… We call it creepy AF! And it gets worse from here…
Hannah told the outlet she wanted to “date for a year” before they got married, so she could get her degree at Juilliard. But Daniel? He immediately shot down that plan! The social media personality recalled:
“Daniel was, like, ‘It’s not going to work, we’ve got to get married now.’”
What he says goes, apparently, because a month later they were engaged! And it was a short engagement, too! Two months afterward they were married and moved in together at an apartment in the Upper West Side. Flash forward to three months after that she was pregnant – becoming the first undergraduate at Juilliard to be expecting “in modern history.” Wow… Hannah continued:
“Our first few years of marriage were really hard, we sacrificed a lot. But we did have this vision, this dream and —”
Daniel then cuts her off to say:
“We still do.”
It’s important to note that he commandeered a lot of the conversation! When asked what sacrifices Hannah made, she replied:
“Well, I gave up dance, which was hard. You give up a piece of yourself. And Daniel gave up his career ambitions.”
But as the article notes, that is not really the case. It sounds like she was the only one who sacrificed her own dreams in the relationship! He called the shots and got everything he wanted. For instance, Daniel wanted a farm – so he got his wish. They now live on a farm with their family. He wants to have a date night once a week, so they always go on one, with a babysitter watching their eight children that evening. The other days of the week? He doesn’t want a nanny in the house, so they don’t have one. Jeez. And the only space Hannah got of her own on their property was a small barn. At first, she wanted to convert it into a ballet studio for herself. However, it ended up becoming the kids’ schoolroom.
On top of taking care of their kids, all eight of them, Hannah does the food shopping, cooks all their meals from scratch, and more. While she does get help from Daniel and their children look after each other, it’s still overwhelming for the mom at times. Her husband even pointed out that she sometimes gets very ill from exhaustion to the point where she can’t get out of bed for a week!
WHAT!?!?!
You would think he would allow a nanny to come in once or twice a week to give her a break for a few hours! Something, at least! She should never get to the point of such exhaustion that she’s sick and bedridden! That’s not OK! JFC. But it’s clear to see her wants and needs are sadly pushed to the side. And unfortunately, there are a lot more problematic moments in this article from there. Like the fact that she gave birth to most of her children at home, except for Henry and Martha. Hannah expressed:
“After that I was, like, I’m ready to go back home. I just love having them at home. It’s so quiet.”
What’s more? She gave birth without an epidural – other than Martha. She only admitted the last point, though, while Daniel was out of the room on the phone, almost like she had to keep that secret from her husband. As the article noted, she lowered her voice as she said:
“I don’t know, I just have never loved taking it. Except with Martha — I was two weeks overdue and she was 10lb and Daniel wasn’t with me … So I got an epidural. And it was an amazing experience.”
When asked where Daniel was that day, she shared:
“It was shipping day [for the meat boxes] and he was manning the crew.”
Jeez. It’s all just heartbreaking. You can read the entire article HERE. After the piece dropped this week, many people took to social media to express their concern for Hannah and disbelief over her lifestyle. And honestly, we can understand why after all these major red flags! See the reactions (below):
“The woman gave up Juilliard! You don’t just get into one of the most competitive arts schools cause you’re good, you have to be a great ballerina. They accept like 12 women and 12 men a year. I can’t. I can’t!”
“This article reveals why the trad wife phenomenon is so dangerous. It encourages young women to become wives and mothers before they get a chance to learn and explore their own ambitions and desires.”
“The Ballerina Farm profile by The Times is so sad. The way people idolize their trad life content when in reality it’s just a broken, exhausted woman who has no say with a Mormon husband who calls all the shots.”
“that ballerinafarm article just f**king depressed me so much i’m still thinking about how she wanted to be a ballerina, was going to julliard, and how she couldn’t say that she enjoyed the epidural on one of her pregnancies around her husband.”
“I don’t think people understand just how insane it is that #ballerinafarm left julliard to start a family. They chose 12 female dancers a year to be accepted into that program. She would’ve gone so far.”
“the ballerina farms situation just breaks my heart, and to think there are so many women like her who give up their dreams for a man/kids :/”
“This Hannah Neeleman’s story is the saddest thing I’ve read in a long time. That man could pull strings to get on the same flight she was on for their “first date” but he couldn’t get her a plane ticket to Greece for her birthday after 8 children???”
“finally read the ballerina farms article. please can we talk about how this billionaire heir engineered a “first date” with a vulnerable young woman travelling alone, locked her in and then completely isolated her in a foreign country to be his own personal incubator”
Content creator Caro Claire Burke said it best, though:
“The real deception that’s taking place with [the Ballerina Farm] account is the appearance of everything being easy, breezy, beautiful when in fact it seems Hannah Neeleman is slowly working herself to death to do multiple jobs, take care of these children, perform as an influencer online, without any additional help.”
@caroclaireburkeee The #ballerinafarm profile we’ve all been waiting for HAS FINALLY ARRIVED ???????????? #fyp #tradwives
♬ original sound – Caro ????????
At this time, Hannah has not responded to the controversy. What are your reactions, Perezcious readers? Sound OFF in the comments below.
[Image via Hannah Neeleman/Instagram/TikTok]