Is This Move a Server Made With a Fork Actually ‘Disgusting’ or Was the Diner Overreacting?

Recently, I saw an online restaurant review where someone said their entire dining experience was ruined because the server did one thing that upset them. That one thing? A fork. There were three people at the table and only two ordered dessert. The server, probably trying to be thoughtful, brought an extra fork for the dessert-less customer, explaining, “This is in case you want to sneak a bite of dessert from one of your friends.” 

The person who didn’t order the dessert left the review saying they had asked for the fork to be taken away because why would someone ever choose to take a bite of food left over by a friend? This simple act by the server was deemed “disgusting” by the customer and it ruined their meal. 

Really? How can something as insignificant as an extra fork taint an otherwise perfectly fine meal? This is a clear example of someone getting in the way of their own happiness.

Whenever someone goes to a restaurant, I want them to have a good time. I’m not just talking about when I was the waiter providing good service to make them happy, I’m talking about anytime someone goes out to eat. Look at your glass of iced tea as half full and not half empty. If your meal doesn’t live up to expectations, know that it’s only one meal out of 1,095 meals in a year. You don’t have to be a Pollyanna, but finding the happy balance between Pollyanna and Negative Nelly can be a wonderful way to always have a pretty good time. 

Don’t seek out mistakes because you will always find them

Don’t look for things that are wrong, look for the things that are great. This isn’t to say you should ignore a glass with lipstick on it, but is a little bit of Rouge Dior 999 enough to wreck the day? Once the server is told about it, a new glass will show up to the table a few minutes later. And living in a world where someone gladly brings you something to drink, whether it’s a frozen Piña Colada or fresh, clean water, is a pretty good reason to be happy.

If a restaurant repeatedly disappoints you, don’t keep going back

 If someone has consistently gone to a restaurant that always disappoints them, there are two theories as to what the issue may be. Either the restaurant is just not good at being a restaurant, or the customer has expectations that the restaurant can’t live up to. Either way, continuing to go to the restaurant makes that customer a glutton for punishment. It’s been said the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. While that’s not anywhere near a true definition of insanity and people erroneously attribute it to Albert Einstein, it does make sense. 

Don’t sweat the small stuff

Setting yourself up for disappointment is again getting in the way of happiness. I once had a coworker who each day would ask, “Is it going to be a great day or is it going to be the greatest day?” I was never quite sure if he was sincere or not when he said it, but it has stuck with me over the years. We have some control over how we perceive each day to be. Of course a restaurant experience can be ruined by bad service, bad atmosphere, bad food, but don’t sweat the small stuff. Even in the worst case scenario, there’s probably something that can be salvaged from a less than perfect restaurant outing. Like, maybe at least the free bread was good?

Happiness is a choice

 It’s easy to get in the way of our own happiness when we seek out things that will make us unhappy. We don’t have to go through life with blinders on, but there’s far more good around us than bad. Even in restaurants. We just have to be open to the possibility of being happy. A panel at a Historical Society of Princeton exhibition of Einstein’s personal effects quoted the scientist and humanitarian as saying, “A table, a chair, a bowl of fruit and a violin; what else does a man need to be happy.” These four things are pretty easy to find in life and three of them can be found in almost any restaurant we go to. And if you go to the right restaurant, you might even find all four of them. Happiness is always there, we just have to look for it.