Wills are a sensitive topic, especially when discussing with parents, children and other family members. Craig Ridge, contentious probate lawyer at Higgs LLP, offers expert advice on how to discuss wills among families.
Google searches for “how to talk to your parents about estate planning” have skyrocketed by 100% in the past month, and “how do I discuss my will” is up by 8%.
When is the best time to discuss your parents’ will?
“There is no ‘perfect time’ to discuss a will with your parents. However, there are factors that might make it easier and more comfortable. I’d advise people to broach the topic of their parents’ will when both parties are in good health, and the dynamics of the family are stable.”
What advice would you give to people struggling to have the conversation surrounding wills with their parents?
“Discussing a will with parents can be a sensitive conversation; however, it is crucial. To ensure that the conversation is as comfortable as possible for both parties, approach the subject with empathy and respect, emphasising the benefits of having a well-organised estate plan for the entire family. It’s helpful to frame it as a proactive measure to ensure their wishes are honoured and to avoid potential conflicts in the future. Be prepared for a range of reactions and remember that the goal is to open a dialogue rather than to push for immediate decisions.
You may consider involving legal support. This can provide impartial guidance and ensure that all necessary aspects of estate planning are addressed comprehensively. This approach not only reassures parents about the process but also helps in addressing any legal complexities and biases that might arise.”
What advice would you give to a parent who wants to discuss their will?
“When discussing your will with your partner or children, it is crucial to approach the conversation with transparency and openness regarding your intentions. This ensures that all family members are fully informed and aligned with your plans and wishes. Such transparency can significantly facilitate a smooth transition of the estate and help mitigate the risk of conflicts or legal disputes after your passing.
It’s important to choose a calm, neutral and private space for these discussions, where people feel safe to speak and share. To ensure that the process runs as smoothly as possible, people may consider involving a legal expert to ensure who can support in reducing potential conflicts and ensuring your wishes are honoured.
What advice would you give to someone whose beneficiaries are displeased with the terms of a will?
If your family member is upset about your will, it’s important to approach the situation with empathy and patience. Listen to their concerns carefully, provide clear explanations of your decisions, and consider professional mediation if necessary.
