7 Types of Sentimental Clutter We All Hang On To

Decluttering is tricky, and whether you’re setting out to streamline a nook, a room, or your whole house, there are always going to be items that are far harder to deal with than others. Broken pens? Easy. The painting kit you will totally do someday soon but still haven’t done since purchasing it three years ago? A little harder. And a little more loaded. There’s a big piece of decluttering that’s very emotional, and the first step is realizing why something affects you.

Professional organizer Tracy McCubbin literally wrote the book on this. “The first step is to be judgment free,” she says. “Everyone has these feelings, and it’s about realizing that having clutter doesn’t mean you’re lazy; it’s much more complicated than that.” There are seven major types of emotional clutter, and each one of them can be better conquered by understanding the thought process behind the emotions. McCubbin also recommends bringing in an accountability buddy to help you power through. Read on to see why your stuff might be holding you back.

The Blasts From the Past

“This is all about the things we keep when looking backward in our life,” McCubbin says. Think about the pair of jeans you fit in 10 years ago but can’t squeeze into anymore (and, let’s be honest, won’t). Keeping those jeans is saying that you kind of like the way things were back then more than you do now, but bodies change, and that’s OK. Toss the jeans!

The Identifiers

McCubbin describes this category as “my stuff tells me who I am.” It could be that you love holding onto designer clothes or bags because you feel like they confirm you’re successful. You don’t wear these items anymore, but they feel like a part of your identity. The same happens with collectors—your collection of mid-century barware may not make you happy anymore, but the process of shopping for them makes you feel like you. You can find new stuff that you identify with, without necessarily keeping all of the old.

The Avoidable

You know that pile of mail you just keeping adding to, or your voicemail box that is totally full? You know the stuff is there and should be dealt with, but it’s easier to avoid it. “This tends to be people who are really successful in their professional lives who don’t want to deal with some of the things in their real life,” McCubbin says. Paper clutter and digital clutter are two of the biggest hurdles here. The trick is to realize what you’re doing, then force yourself (grab a buddy!) to conquer this small stuff.

The Fantasy Life Accessories

“This is about the people who keep stuff and consume stuff for the life they should be living, not the life they’re actually living,” she says. This includes people who take on new hobbies, buying everything they need to be a pro at a craft like weaving without ever actually trying it, as well as those with to-read book piles that are about to touch the ceiling. We all wish we had more time than we do, but some of these things just aren’t fitting into your life, and that’s alright. You can donate them!

The Good Stuff

Many of us grew up in homes where “the good stuff” only came out when company came over. We’re talking about grandma’s china or the flatware from a wedding registry. There are also the items we buy ourselves that are “too good” to use like that beautiful candle we bought over the holidays or a gorgeous formal dress we’re saving for just the right occasion. “Not wearing your nice clothes, not burning that beautiful candle, not using your china, it’s saving your good stuff because you don’t think you’re special enough or you don’t think today is special enough,” McCubbin says. But what use are those items if they’re never, well, used? Use your nice stuff or nix it.

Other People’s Items

There are a few different categories here. One is keeping gifts people give you that you have no intention of using or wearing. This also includes stuff you’ve inherited, such as a dining table from a deceased relative. “This is understanding that you don’t want the stuff, you want the memories of the person you lost,” McCubbin says. So, how can you find ways to stay connected to them without the stuff?” In both cases, there’s a lot of guilt here, and that can be a hard thing to overcome. But, understanding why you feel this way, and thinking about other ways to pay homage to the people you love can help.

The Things You Overpaid For

This is all about not getting rid of that expensive piece of exercise equipment you touch once a year or that dress that still has the tags on it because you paid a lot for it in the first place. “It’s about understanding that we’re human and we make mistakes and that doesn’t make us a bad person,” McCubbin says. If you won’t be using that stuff, it doesn’t matter how much you paid for it because it’s just sitting there and reminding you that it was probably not a smart purchase. As Elsa once sang: let it go.